Worrying and constructive problem-solving are not the same.
Today’s article, after looking at why worrying does not benefit you, explores how to break this powerful negative pattern of thinking. As someone who has experienced debilitating anxiety throughout much of my life, I hope you will find both encouragement and empowerment in these words. Love, Story
Worrying is the most pervasive form of fear-based expression in the world. If you give it your power, then that power will come to contain and limit you.
Worrying has many colors, spanning from self-punishment to the back-to-front belief that you must be a particularly caring and worthy person to spend so much of your time worrying.
Worrying is an intellectual extrapolation of our primal physical survival instinct — an instinct that now rarely serves us.
See how the act of worrying gives your energy to your fears and serves to manifest, rather than prevent, what you are worrying about.
To worry is a demonstration of a lack of trust in yourself.
Often we use ideas that are presented through reason and logic to disguise feelings we are uncomfortable with. We do this in order to conceal them from both ourselves and others.
Worrying is one of the most pervasive and damaging expressions of our fear because of how it causes us to stay within a repetitive circular train-of-thought that feels bad. We willingly do this through a belief that “worrying is better than not worrying” because we like to think that we are focused on finding a solution.
If you believe in the validity of the need to worry, then not worrying feels like sticking your head in the sand when there is danger or something “going wrong” around you.
Worrying does not feel good and a negative feeling is always an alert to stop for a moment and seek a greater awareness of whatever is feeling bad. An uncomfortable feeling is an indicator you are moving away from what you want to create — rather than towards it.
Worrying thoughts tell you that you are desperate for a solution but they do not lead you toward a solution.
For someone who is extremely mental, it does not seem logical that you must become conscious of your feelings to become fully conscious of your beliefs. This is because they experience feeling and thought as being separate / unrelated. But, as with all separation, this is a perceptual illusion.
You must know your feelings to fully understand your thoughts.
You must know your thoughts to fully understand your feelings.
Be conscious of both your feelings and beliefs and you will become a conscious master of your belief system, instead of an unconsciously anxious, fearful victim of your emotional wounds.
To become conscious is to have faced and resolved your painful feelings — including how those negative feelings shifted your thinking.
Worrying is an expression of your fears; it is not constructive problem solving.
Worrying is to use your imagination to destroy — instead of create.
To cease to worry is to release the need to control your reality. And that is to confront your fear directly, rather than experience it through the guise of a worry you have determined to be justified.
Seeking to not worry is a useful tool to identify and release fears. However, beyond “not worrying” is a deeper surrender to the feeling-based flow of life that arises from having trust in yourself and the unfolding of your life.
Following the compass provided by this positive feeling (instead of the path of your anxiety) will guide you towards your joys instead of your worries.
Worrying is an expression of fear through which we try to control our reality from a perspective of pain avoidance.
To worry is to define yourself from a definition of pain rather than joy.
Only you have the power over which thoughts you give your energy to. Do not berate yourself for having worrying thoughts, as this only compounds the feeling of discomfort.
When you identify that you are focusing on worrying thoughts, let them go. Unless you are already at the point of releasing the associated fear, then doing this will bring up the fear behind the thoughts, such that you can then directly work with that fear (rather than indirectly through its manifestation as worry).
Do not fear that to not worry is to live in delusion.
Free your mind from worry. To not worry is to live in inner trust, joy, and love. This life does not need you to worry. No one needs you to worry. Worry does not need to be your reaction to life — there are other ways.
Choose spontaneity — not worry.
Choose love — not fear.
How To Break The Cycle Of Worrying
If you are a long term worrier, then the journey of releasing worry from your life will take time because of how worrying will have become so integrated into your daily thought processes.
At first you are likely to find yourself deep in worry before you catch it. It is important to not berate yourself for this as any behavior that has built over years will naturally take time to shift. Therefore, when you find yourself worrying, instead of chastising yourself for how anxious you may already be, praise yourself for becoming conscious of the negative thought-loop while within it. This is the key to breaking the cycle.
Learn to change your focus while within the pattern.
Next, actively focus on holding a positive-view of whatever you are worrying about. Do this by imagining many ways — no matter how fantastical — in which the situation could evolve to your benefit. Through this process, slowly but surely, you will worry less and catch yourself more quickly when you do.
Key to this is not seeing worrying as the enemy.
Through this process, keep reminding yourself that — whether you are worrying or not — you are always doing your best to deal with life. Holding this perspective will help address the ways in which you may mentally beat yourself up. Remember, we can only ever do our best.
Berating yourself when you have done your best is to hear negative voices from your past — it is entrenched wounded thinking that only you have the power to release. You do not need a fearful, negative voice yelling at you in order to survive in this world.
Worrying does not solve problems.
Worrying solves nothing.
Love and nurture whatever you wish to transform.
“I choose to deal with my wounding directly rather than through being a fearful person who worries about the future.”