Your life is a dance stage and you are its dancer, and
“Tango is where passion and love last forever.”
In my opinion, tango is the dance with movements coming from passion and love, and they are what make you feel fulfilled in every area of your life. Without passion and love, everything seems to fade, from lack of color and life.
Throughout our lives, we dance this dance in one or two, following its rhythm, or stepping against it, because life offers us ups and downs, but we all want a beautiful life and someone who will be with us sharing the love. We are not here to blame others for our lives but to learn our own lessons every day in a way that our variant today is better than yesterday one, and we do not die with the regret that our life could be different.
Dancing against the Rhythm
When you do not accept what your life has in its bag for you, you ask others to be different, to be how you want. You ask others to change themselves because you feel better, but you do not want to change yourself, or you consider yourself better than others and there is no need to change yourself. You ask for somebody else’s love, but you don’t show signs that you love yourself. It’s like trying to dance another dance in the rhythm of tango.
On the one hand, we see ourselves in the position of a victim, that we have loved or love and consider that the partner offers us nothing.
On the other side, as I said before when thinking you love someone, you give up a lot of things for that person, and at some point, feeling empty inside, you understand you were not living your own life. You understand that making so many compromises in that relationship you are not the person you have thought you were or want to be, but the person your partner wants you to be.
My ex used to tell me almost every time we have had an agreement that he is unhappy. At first, I wondered what I am not doing well, what I should do, and help him not be unhappy. It hurt me to do everything I knew and trying to be good, and that reproach came again and again in my life. Then, slowly, slowly I realized that what you, as a man, do not have inside you and you do not offer to yourself, you will never have. When you can not do not see yourself as being loved, no one and nothing will mean love to you, because you are the one who does not know how to love yourself. When you do not love yourself, you can not give anything because you do not know what you have to give and wait only to receive and at the same time, even if you receive it, you do not see this, and the other is completely drained of energy. It’s something I had come to experience because I felt empty inside. I felt like I had nothing left to do. I felt like I didn’t have the resources to offer anything anymore. Thus, I had the opportunity to cry and consider my own life a failure, or to change myself and move on.
You cry that you are doomed to failure and loneliness but no one is a failure, just as no one is condemned to the good. The arguments in our lives bring out our own and others’ pain to the light. What do we do with the arguments? Sometimes we use them to “stab the back” of the loved one and imagine that we are feeling good, but it is only our ego that is satisfied with the pain of the one in front of you. The agreement keeps souls apart, and it is said that the more people scream to each other, the more their souls are going far away from each other, and in my opinion, the better the ego feels. In addition, crying you only live in anger, and an angry man cares for nothing, and sometimes he does not even care about his life.
But life is one, here and now, and it is worth living!
What to do?
- Use the arguments in your life to see what hurts you and your partner. Use the arguments to get to know yourself and the other person.
- Accept to fall to have where to get up and move on from, because the ups can not exist without downs.
- On your way, you can help others to stand up for themselves.
- Do not expect anyone to give you what you do not give yourself
- Smile, laugh and dance.
- Respect and love yourself, for there is no one better than you.
Respecting and loving yourself, you are in the tune of your life and it will be easier to accept others and love them as they are.
No one was born a master and no one is perfect, for we all are here to learn to dance the tango of our lives learning from everyone around us and especially from our own experience.
In every relationship, each one has his unique contribution and loves in his own way. I mean, you can’t make me love you the way you want, just as I can’t make you love me the way I want, but we can live to love each other.
As Tango does not need words, for its movement means passion and love, you can live your life well when using those passion and love.
“Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion.” – Martha Graham
Copyright © 2019 Manuela@inalove.world