Whether we are familiar with religious texts or not, no matter our spiritual beliefs—whether you identify as a Christian, a pagan, or something else entirely—we all possess the remarkable ability to forgive.

“I don’t forgive”, “I can’t forgive”, “let whoever wants to forgive him, but I can’t”, “may God forgive him”, “I forgive him because it’s a sin not to forgive”, all are expressions of a conditional forgiveness. It is a false forgiveness, born of selfishness because it is rooted solely in the desire to justify your actions or avoid conflict. A conditional forgiveness is also the one born out of fear of divine punishment.

Asking others to seek our forgiveness, whether by kneeling or by offering us various benefits, is often driven by our own fears and feeds our selfishness.

A lack of forgiveness often stems from our difficulty in accepting and embracing another person’s perspective. We may cling to our own narrative, struggling to recognise that their truth can differ significantly from ours. This resistance to accepting diverse truths can create barriers to understanding and connection. Embracing the idea that everyone experiences life through their unique lens encourages compassion and opens the door to deeper, more meaningful relationships.

“I forgive you, but I can’t forget…” remains a half-measure forgiveness and only burdens us even more. In return, true forgiveness, coming from the garden of our soul, frees us from the knots of memories, gives us the freedom to cross the gaps between the past and the present, giving us the freedom to build our future differently, freed from the chains of the past.

“Forgiveness is a creative act that changes us from prisoners of the past to liberated people at peace with our memories…”

Colin Fry

Being a true gift, its power lies in the understanding that we are all human, navigating our ways through life’s challenges together, and none of us is inherently superior or inferior to another.

Equally important is forgiving ourselves. Reflecting on our past and recognising that, in every situation, we were doing our best with the knowledge, skills, and awareness we had at that moment. By acknowledging this, we grant ourselves compassion and understanding, which in turn allows us offer forgiveness to others genuinely.

Forgiveness can be extended to anyone walking into our lives, not only family members, despite any hurtful words or actions people may have directed toward us.

True forgiveness requires no conditions. It doesn’t demand that you get on your knees or have witnesses. True forgiveness comes from a deep, heartfelt place—an authentic expression that resonates within us, reflecting our inner truth, and as Colin Fry emphasises, brings peace to the soul and at the same time, harmony to our lives.

References:

• Colin Fry – Secrets from the afterlife
• Manuela Timofte – Garden of Love

Love, Manuela

Photo by me

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Initially published: https://medium.com/