With Love,
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
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I told you about my move into a village, in a previous post. Moving there I could make another dream true. I started a small orchard and a flower garden.
Some people have asked me the reason I plant so many trees for I will not be able to eat so many fruits. My answer was that those fruits will be enjoyed by generations to come.
Generally, we all think of leaving something behind us. Why?
I told you about my move into a village, in a previous post. Moving there I could make another dream true. I started a small orchard and a flower garden.
Some people have asked me the reason I plant so many trees for I will not be able to eat so many fruits. My answer was that those fruits will be enjoyed by generations to come.
Generally, we all think of leaving something behind us. Why?
Mom and dad are the first or among the first words, a child learns when he starts talking. At the same time, they are words whose meaning will be understood much later in life by some, and not by others because they did not have to opportunity to know them. I am talking about children who grow up with one parent because the other one has decided that it is better to live without responsibilities or orphaned children who for some reason do not have any of his parents in their lives. Could they say thank you to the missing parents? Can I tell you “thank you?”
Mom and Dad are the first persons who should write together the first chapters of the child’s life. Chapters, from which trust and self-esteem are born. Yet, what happens when one is missing from your life?
When you grow up with only one parent, and you think that you did something wrong, that you are a bad child … Though, how to live without that important part of your life as it is one of the parents. Can you thank the parent who does not want to be part of your life?
Some fathers have been sons, many sons become fathers, but some have forgotten what they were, and there is no one to explain to the others what they will be.
– Jose Saramago
Dear father,
This is a letter I am writing as an adult. Now, I know what I do because of other people who were around me but you.
If I listen to some people, you have only flaws because you did not want to raise your child. Listening to others, you have qualities but how do I have to know them? You have decided that it is easier for you if your son will grow up without you getting involved. Then how to know you?
As a child, I would have liked to know you, to grow up with a model near me, without looking for one among strangers. To meet you to get to know me better and to find my way in life more easily.
Being a child, I considered myself that I am punished for living without a father because I am a bad child. This is how I knew that “sinners” are punished. Was it my sin that I was born? Was your lack of presence in my life my sin?
I grew up with the illusion that one day you will come to be part of my journey. Or maybe, someone will take your place. Thus, being a child, I was asking each relative who was visiting my mother and I “Do you want to be my father?”
Besides, when my mother could not fulfil the role of father, I read or asked strangers, because you were not around me.
While learning to walk and falling you were not around me. You didn’t even hear me telling my first stories as I knew them.
You weren’t there to help me get up when I was beaten or bullied. Not even when I had nightmares or fever.
I am sure now that you will never understand what it is like to cry rivers of tears asking “why does not my father come to see me?” You will never know how many tears I cried when I was looking at my friends running into their father’s arms. How I was aching when they hugged or jumped their children on their shoulders. Where was my sin?
You weren’t near me when I needed you to warm my frozen hands. When I needed you to teach me how to ride a bike, use roller skates or rollers.
You were not near me when I learned to swim or dance. Not even to support me when I went to competitions, to laugh and be happy for my prizes. Not even when I needed to know how to conquer a girl.
You will never know how much I wished to know you dead than to accept that you did not want me in your life. Maybe, I could easily get over your absence in my life.
Yet, because I was not a bad child, I always found strangers who helped me. They supported and encouraged me, for they were more fond of me than you, “dear father”, was.
A child looks up at the stars and wonders. A great father puts a child on his shoulders and helps them to grab a star.
― Reed B Markham
I wish you could put me on your shoulders and help me grab my star.
I wish you dared to come and see me, but you let the years pass as if we have all the time in the world. When crying and asking to see you, you weren’t near me. Not even for my birthdays.
You haven’t been there to make me feel safe. You weren’t there to see that
There’s nothing that moves a loving father’s soul quite like his child’s cry.
– Joni Eareckson Tada
I wish you were near me when I learned how to read and write. I wish you were there to run into your arms to show you what I can do. To show you my drawings or to make together presents for my mum.
To share with you the few gifts I received from Santa. I wish you were with me to feel the warmth of your hugs.
Growing up, I was looking for meeting you, to know why you didn’t want me in your life. I found only a thick wall called selfishness and lack of interest.
For many people, children are gifts. For some, they are burdens. I learned that you belong to the second category.
I have learned that some people want their children and cannot have them. Others have children and abandon them. Also, you lost first place.
I was told that wishes become true, if I want to and take action. Thus, I wish to know you became true because I have wanted to. In that way, I learned that an adult remains a frustrated child if he doesn’t do something to change himself. If he does not take action to pursue his dreams.
I learned to become independent and be responsible for my actions.
I learned that you will never know that being proud of me would have made you proud of yourself. Instead, I am proud of the man I have become.
Now, after I met you, I can’t say that you are dear to me. Instead, I learned not to hate you. I don’t even miss you anymore. Moreover, I would feel you like an obstacle in my path if you would be close.
Maybe one day I will have sons who will tell me “dad” just as I could never tell you that word.
So, I can tell you “thank you” for everything I have learned without your presence in my life and for not being part of i
(to whom others have explained what to be a son is like and what to be a father will be like.)
Photo credit Pexels
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
Many times I read about heroic mothers, their role in the family and raising children. Unlike them, men are heroes on the battlefield, they have big muscles and in movies, they have miraculous powers. Though, my father, a common man is the hero of my life.
Last week was 24 years since I lost my father. My discussion with one of the bloggers who just lost his father a few weeks ago, made me decide to write this post.
Even if I cannot write from a man’s or son’s point of view, yet I can do it as my father’s daughter and as a single mother who raised her only son.
In my opinion, being a hero is not just about winning on a battlefield. Being a hero is coping with everyday problems, and loving your family despite negative events of any kind. It means, above all, to love your children. To be an example for them in loving and respecting everything good and beautiful in All.
To me, my dad is a hero. Maybe for each of you, your father is a hero in the same way or others.
My father didn’t look like a fairy tale or movie hero, was neither very tall nor short. He was not a boxer and had no miraculous powers. He was a common man, a worker, and what he offered me as his daughter is priceless.
His eyes were speaking to you. After his looking, you knew if you had to hide as far as you could, or that you could laugh with him.
Dad was the first person who made me love math. In the first class, I could not make a clear distinction between addition and subtraction. Thus, I was operating them the other way around. I didn’t understand them from school, and he took action. He used cardboard/wood cubes, which were my toys during Ceausescu’s time. He taught me to add and subtract with the help of those cubes and with a lot of patience for the child’s mind. My love for mathematics began there, and I still have it.
He was a man who managed to instil my love for history. He was proud that he was Romanian, that he was a descendant of the Geto-Dacians and proud to be born in Stefan’s Moldavia. Loving history, he had the entire collection of “Historical Magazine” from their appearance until he died. My interest in history was increased by the way he was telling the stories and discussing with me what I was reading.
My father made me love nature, although he didn’t travel much. Being a large family, we did not allow long-distance trips. We were making walks only in the hills near the flat where we lived. We played with a ball or ran and played in the grass. He was taking pictures and telling us stories about his childhood. Thus, he showed me the joy and tranquillity offered by nature.
At 2 years old, I was bitten by a dog. Despite this fact, it made me understand that I can love dogs. He explained to me that a man can make mistakes in a relationship with a dog but it only loves unconditionally or defends itself.
My father made me love music, being himself a music lover and an innate romantic. At the time when I was born, my relatives said I had to be named Elena because of the day I was born. He had heard Julio Iglesias’ new song: “Manuela” and his decision had been made. My name was going to be “Manuela”. Besides, he liked to play the accordion or listen to records with light or symphonic music.
His love for books and poetry inspired me. He was not just an avid reader with a rich general culture, without having a higher education. Wherever he went on his walks, he had a book or a Historical Magazine with him. He was also a poet, though he was not considered one.
It made me love writing and calligraphy. To see writing as an art not only in what you express by writing but also, in the way you shape the letters with a pencil on paper.
He gave me a sense of security and a desire to read and know. He defended me in front of others because I was spending too much time on books. His words were, “let her read, for she likes it.”
He showed me that I can believe in myself, and can handle things that were considered only by a boy/ man’s competence. He said “let her learn if she wants. She can use those skills in her life when she’s alone.” “It is true, my dear father, I can change my light bulb alone, I can beat nails, I can cut wood, in fact, I can do everything I want to.
He showed me how far a parent’s love can go. For the first time, I was married only for a month. My husband’s jealousy was huge and he beat me until I fainted. My father was hit in front of the court because he took my defence.
He was a firm man, who was speaking his voice, defending others when he felt he had to. He did not love the lie and injustice. That’s why the people he worked with respected and loved him.
When he died, I was going through a second divorce and I had a 3-year-old son. Being retired at that time, his help along with my mother’s had been huge for me in raising my son. Especially because my son’s father did not show interest in his son’s existence.
I did not know what I know today about energies, vibrations, and spirits. Thus, I grieved my father for a long time. After a few months, he appeared in one of my dreams. He told me “do not cry anymore because I will always take care of you and your child”.
I have always felt protected myself and my child with my father’s love. That’s why, for me, he was and will remain my hero. My father was not a hero in fairy tales or movies. He didn’t say “I love you, my child” but he showed me through everything he did that he loves me and my siblings.
He is the hero who took care of what was planted in the mind and soul of a child.
My father is the hero of my life!
Imagine de Bessi de la Pixabay
With Love,
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
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Every little thing is part of something big. Every great thing is built of small things. They are the basis of great things, so they can make a big difference through their existence.
Usually, we do not give importance to them. We are looking for great things because for ego, “great” means power and value. Therefore, we are taught to look at the whole or the great part of it without paying attention to the small things that compose it. Thus, we do not pay attention to small things, people with no higher education and simple lives.
They seem insignificant to us. Are they?
How would the sky be without stars? The forest without trees? The tree without branches, leaves and flowers? Flower without petals? Snow without flakes? Rain without drops?
Every little thing has its place and purpose. Little things add up to big things.
So do we. When you look at a man or you see yourself in the mirror, you see clothes, jewelry, makeup. What if you look beneath the surface? What would you be without your interior, without mind and soul? An empty coat? The makeup wears off, the beauty fades, yet the warmth and soul beauty are there all the time. Moreover, each of us is a “little thing” of our world.
There are so many little things in our life and our soul enjoy them. Even if, there are things you do not pay attention to, they can change someone else’s day or destiny. They create magic because they have power.
A smile has power for it has its beauty.
“Just one smile
Immensely increases the beauty
Of the universe.”
― Sri Chinmoy
Each smile can do it. There are not two identical smiles, for we are not two alike. We are all different and beautiful, for all souls are beautiful. Think of any child smiling at you. It is like the whole universe is yours.
Any smile turns on the light from within without. It is the known “so within, so without”. If your eyes are windows of your soul, your smile will be the door of it. Smiling, you open the door of your soul and its light shines.
A gift is a seen or unseen drop of wrapped love. It is a form of unspoken words and expressed in a song, a picture, a photo, a perfume or a little box with beautiful ribbon. They are keys of letting love flow freely. They are a way of expressing gratitude, respect and love. In any seize it comes, a gift encapsulates a wish of freezing love for ever.
A flower is also a gift. It is a symbol of someone else’s respect and love for you. You smile when receiving it, for as Ralph Waldo Emerson says:
“The earth laughs in flowers.”
A word can also be a gift. Deep in your heart, words are always waiting to be written, spoken or expressed.
Write or speak the words wanted to be born and let your loved ones or the whole world know how much you care about. Let them inspire, and they may become flowers instead of weeds.
It happened to me to thank people and be asked why I do it. Many times I was a little surprised. I think we are so caught up in our daily lives run that we forget how to thank or receive a warm and sincere “thank you”. We forget simple words, a small thing that can bring a big smile on someone else’s face. When someone does it, they have a reason to say those words “thank you.” Maybe you have given them a hint they needed, a solution they were looking for, or you just lighted their sky on that day.
If it’s hard for you to do it is your ego that does not feel well. It wants to be superior to others.
It is not easy for ego to say “I’m sorry”, in a society where the ego dominates. Where everyone wants to be right. Where each one feels better or worthier than the one we should say those words to. However, when spoken, they do not change the past but lets things go at their own pace. These words build bridges between the past and the future.
“Sorry is a question that begs forgiveness, because the metronome of a good heart won’t settle until things are set right and true. Sorry doesn’t take things back, but it pushes things forward. It bridges the gap. Sorry is a sacrament. It’s an offering. A gift.”
― Craig Silvey
In my opinion they are the most difficult words to be said. Most of the time they are said because we are afraid of losing something or someone from our lives. Telling them deep from your soul, they have power, for you are not afraid of anything. You know love is there in any soul waiting its door to be opened.
A smile, a word, a flower, a song, a picture are all little things in our life. Regardless their seize, they have power and impact on our lives and those around us.
“May your message to the world be the music that inspires the listener’s soul to dance.” ― Nanette Mathews
Giving and receiving little things, they bring happiness to everyone. They become the keys to unlock someone else’s soul door.
“Never underestimate the power
of a simple smile, a kind word
or the acknowledgement of another.
Little gestures can move mountains.”
― David Cuschieri
Little things have great power for they add up to big things. Bearing your energetic print, those little things make a big difference in our world.
The perfect time for them is NOW!
With Love,
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
Every sunrise is a new beginning. It is for the flower that opens looking to the sun. It is for the birds flying. For the tree that grows freely or for the man who has awakened to a new day.
It is the same with our lives. Every day is a new beginning.
Usually, when making mistakes, you see that as something wrong. You see it as an end. Thus, you may be afraid to continue what you were doing. You are afraid of trying something else. In fact, you are afraid of the unknown. However, every time you start again, you step over your fear.
Every marriage is a new beginning. Divorce is an end that brings a new beginning in your life. Also, a child brings a new chapter in your life. He will be a good part of your life.
Though, life is neither just about good things nor bad things. It is a mix of both. Bad things happen and always do, but they have their role in just writing pages of your own story. They have their role making us to see a beginning at every end.
No beginning is easy, especially after a tragedy. You do not know what to do, where to walk to, you feel that you do not live the same way. In fact, you won’t do it anymore because what has left your life left a void that needs to be filled. Sometimes you feel that the emptiness is huge and cannot be filled with someone or something else. However, the laws of physics show us that every void is filled with something new. You are the one who can decide who or what will fill that in your life.
Thus, each end is a change that comes in our life. What will fill it is a start as you continue your journey for another chunk of time. In addition, every time, people and things that have the role of guiding you will appear in your way.
Everything new or bad bring a change. Each change means an adaptation to something different. It means going over past, taking with you what was good and learning new things.
To start something new should not mean:
You do not have to postpone what you were doing, for nobody else is going to do it for you. Do what you wanted previously. What you live is not a nightmare. Your pain is part of your life. Make your life easier accepting that and do what you feel you have to do!
For action, your mind is taught to look for solutions and see with your eyes for believing. It is not easy, but you can learn to follow your soul. Do what you feel, even if you don’t know where that action will take you.
“Before Everything Happens,
We Must First Begin.” ― Dragos Bratasanu
Coming into this life is a new beginning. Getting walking and talking is another start. It is a new start when moving from kindergarten to school. A new beginning is a transition from the primary school to the gymnasium, then to the high school. Moving to a college, a new job, a marriage or divorce are all new beginnings in your life. And you do them.
I said in an old post that I have worked abroad, so I opted for a new start. When I returned to my country, I ended another chapter of my life and had a new beginning.
I moved from town to village, from a flat to a country house. I used to live using gas and running water. I started using water from my own fountain and setting up a wood-fired oven because I opted for that start. When I moved, I didn’t know how to use the stove. I didn’t know how to cut wood. Now, I cut them using the hand saw and the ax. I didn’t know how to mow the grass, but I can use the scythe when I need to. All because I wanted the change.
Looking around, you can see change all around in nature and can learn from it to have a new beginning.
The night is an end that brings a new day. It is a new beginning. Nature undresses her clothes in autumn and winter for putting them on again in spring and summer. The new year is an end giving birth to a new beginning.
Every sunrise is a new beginning. It is a new opportunity.
Each seed means a new beginning. We can choose to wet it and take care of it or let it dry. That seed comes from our soul and desires.
Failure is not the end. The tragedy is not the end. Every end is a new beginning. Everything has a new beginning. We can look at the ashes of dreams or loved ones and cry for as it is an end. Yet, in this end, there is always a new beginning. As Craig D. Lounsbrough says:
“Today’s ashes are tomorrow’s soil.”
It is the soil of new dreams, of new relationships. It is the continuation of life in other places, conditions, with other people, in a different way than we knew before. Actually, being alive means your choice to start again because every sunrise is a new beginning!
With Love,
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
These are very much reflected in the way a country and the world we live in look. In my opinion, government slogans say a lot about how they want us to think of the way they think. But their facts speak better.
Thus, many words and little deeds can be found in the flyers people share in electoral campaigns. Such flyers I found last week at the door of the house. I’m not surprised there is money for something like that. I am not even surprised by the fact that money is found for a certain quality of paper and pictures to attract people’s attention. It is the society we live in that claims to see the value of man, although the only seen value is one of money.
They claim that they respect people, but they do not make things happen for the man’s good. Reading one of the flyers, I found many words and so little truth that comes from the actions of the government.
They denigrate each other in front of people and media. In places where common people cannot see them, they share words and facts for their good.
1. One of the slogans I found was that a normal country begins with “respect for fundamental values“. The true and beautiful slogan, but whose values are they talking about? From what is happening in the country and the world, it does not seem that we are doing that.
When they respect man, they talk to him, looking for ways to solve his dissatisfaction. You seek to resolve the cause, as it happens in German medicine. You do not solve the effect produced by the measures taken by the same people who only change functions or parties.
2. They say that “the law is a law for all.” Governors are the first for whom the law is not law, and offenders even make the law for them. They don’t pay for what they do.
3. They are also talking about “responsible governance“. To whom? To themselves and the elite they represent? There are so few places where man is treated with true respect. Without the elite position and a lot of money, the man stays in line with the hours, does not see his rights respected or is punished.
4. They are talking about respect for all people and are proud of themselves for the raises of pensions, salaries, and allowances. In fact, several times a year all prices rise. Where are the respect for each human being and the responsibility of their functions?
I have sent petitions to different ministries, and only one answered each time. It is the only one who has directed the petitions to the territorial administrative units for solving them. The last petition related to what I am telling you below has not even received registration from one of the ministries.
I’m talking about a petition some locals made, about a 100-year-old fountain that serves several families. A neighboor of the fountain plot built his toilette and the farm of pigs a few meters from the fountain. Following the first petition, water analyzes were performed. There are exceeds of the maximum concentration allowed for nitrates, Ecoles, enterococci, B. coliforms … The answer from the mayor’s office was that the culprit who made his buildings near the fountain is not guilty. The health department has asked the fountain owners to clean it. The cause did not seem to be found but the effect has to be called off. The people appealed against the lack of measures for calling off the causes of destroying the quality of water. The institution to which the petition was redirected has not given any sign of interest yet.
Where is their responsibility? Are they responsible only as long as they do not affect their interests?
The economic growth is not as wanted, there is no budget money for schools and hospitals, for roads. But there is money for expensive cars, trips in the country and abroad, an expensive election campaign.
If they care about people and moral values, they have to:
“As the lightning brings light, and the thunder and fire flows from the light, so is the man’s thought, it passes on to the man’s words and then into his deeds. So, remember this, because light and thunder must be till the burning fire. The man’s light is his thought and this is his most valuable asset. Light has power through the word, and man’s will ignites the fire through which all that are around him are made.” (2)
With Love,
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
According to the dictionary, to promise means to tell someone that you will do something. To be sure that you will do it. Everyone feels appreciation when the promise is respected. However, life is full of unfulfilled promises.
There are promises we make to ourselves, to others and others to us. It is a circle in which we can endlessly spin. Besides, we feel that if we complain, fight or hurt each other, we will solve something.
There are promises of your loved one that he will call you. He does not do it, for he is comfortable as is or because he forgot to.
There are promises parents make to the children and are not respected. The child will grow up with the idea that he is not good enough. He will think he can make promises without keeping them.
There are husband’s unkept promises that he will not drink, or that he will bring the money home. His wife and children will no longer believe in him. Children copy what they see and will have an example of a liar.
There are promises of those whom we choose to represent us. Once they have reached where they want, they forget about their promises. They will only remember one thing: how to be richer with what they take from others.
As a rule, they use positive forms to attract people. Words that would make them credible. When they reach where they want, they forget their words. They will have only one answer for everything: that it is not possible, because there is no money. Unfortunately, they will have money for everything they want. In this way, they represent the best example of high-level lies. Or, as Pierce Brown says,
“Liars make the best promises.”
We have candidates for all kinds of positions that win their votes by fake promises and buying people’s vote. I did not see any candidate going from place to place through the country, without security, and talking to people. I did not see them listening to people wishes and dissatisfaction. To follow them, conclude and take steps that are needed.
In my opinion, no party is better than another. Politics is all a lie. All that makes is lying, stealing, taking everything it can. If you appeal to them, to solve local problems, they throw the responsibility from one institution to another or shut them down. The taken measures are for not disturbing those who give them their complete support. Politicians are the first who do not respect the laws.
1. More than 20 years ago, as president of a polling station, I witnessed a way of falsifying the number of votes. When I had to handle over the papers, somebody took them from my hand. Besides, before entering the official office for checking, I was given the cancelled votes as counted votes for the party in question at that time. Moreover, they asked me to keep my mouth shut. I froze understanding how big the lie can be to those greedy by power. How big is the lie we live?
2. For the problems in the village where I live, I also contacted the party represented by certain people who do “what they like”. I sent messages using the party’s website and called the phone number existing on the site. Besides, I contacted the person who just occupied a leading position in the government, writing his a private message on Fb. I haven’t received an answer yet. 🙂 He could say “ I do not want, know or have time to answer. Someone else would contact you”. They all are “selling doughnuts”. The local party branch told me that someone would contact me. Nothing at all.
If indeed, those with power would have an interest in keeping promises, they would consider the people’s opinions, because the crowd votes them. Or at least, it seems to be that way. Here, I agree with what Dennis E. Adonis says:
“Voting is not a right. It is a method used to determine which politician was most able to brainwash you. ”
– roads “crying” to be worked
– schools to have the necessary conditions for children
– programs unchanged for years
– schoolbooks with mistakes
– unlighted villages at night
– elderly who walk 10 km to town to buy medicine or food
– children walking to school, in the dark, with a flashlight in hand
– forested forests mercilessness
– bureaucracy without limits
– representatives of the authorities who do not comply with the law
– countless laws that apply only to the simple man
– historical monuments to be repaired
All comes down to fake promises (lies) for people and the country. Thus, promises remain on paper only for election time. Otherwise, the wind takes their promises and turns them into their full accounts. They do not forget to lie.
You believe in their promises. Moreover, you give them your vote, that becomes their right to do what they want to. They are making the law and are careful to have diplomatic immunity. Therefore, they know that you cannot hold them accountable for what they do. Thus, believing in their promises, they will lead to you being broken.
What do you have left? The pain of giving them your vote and believing in them? If people don’t go to vote them, how would they be elected?
What would our world be like if we not only make promises but make things happen? What about you? Do you make promises you can keep?
With Love,
Copyright © 2019 manuela@inalove.world
In a Love World 