By Raphael Awen
July 18, 2017
‘Can I actually have what I most deeply want?’
‘Isn’t gratitude for what I have the opposite of wanting more?’
These questions repeatedly come to anyone who chooses to awaken their emotional body? They came to me again last night as I felt another layer of what I so deeply want.
To learn of deep abounding beauty that you don’t normally experience is to subject yourself to longing and despair that you don’t currently have that in your life. It takes big courage just to awaken that far. To then set out to obtain that deep beauty as your living reality is to call on resources of courage and choice that will surely be tested and tried moving forward.
How much easier and understandable it is for the masses to choose to remain asleep to desire. In moments, you are tempted to choose the path of the masses if you had any inkling that it could actually work for you.
You know you are here for more. You know that’s ‘just what is’ in your relationship to life. You also know any spirituality that offers the killing of your desire in the name of ‘overcoming attachment’ won’t work for you. You want more and you know it.
But life doesn’t actually offer you any kind of unconditional guarantee that you will obtain the desire of your quest for more, in exchange for your willingness to want so deeply. What life does offer you however, is the opportunity to embrace, and be in the aliveness of your desire for more. This is where the meaning is felt and found. I am a living breathing ‘wanter’.
I get to be in want.
I am a lover of love and love is so infinite and so multi-faceted that in surrendering to being in love’s want, I am sure to always be wanting something more than what I currently have, as beautiful, and even super-abundant as my current reality may be, and may go on to become.
We came from infinite source ‘having it all’ and yet we wanted more. So we came here, to be in lack, and want, to feel all there is to feel about this paradox. I am The All out wanting more.
I do get to fully enjoy every fulfilled desire along the way. I get to be in gratitude for both my wants AND what my wants have brought me. Every attachment that I ever clutched onto for as long as I did, be it a healthy or an unhealthy attachment, was really for me simply LOVE, in the way that it was, for the time that it was. It may no longer be love for me as I move on to deeper experiences of love, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t deep and abounding love in the way and time that it was.
In fact, everything that I ever wanted and will ever want is simply love. Love is the source of all. I’m told that you and I can have all that we are ready and willing to let in, AND, when and as we are ready for it, we can have it TOGETHER too, in community.
How’s that for a deal? How’s that for a new world order? You and I get to be the deepest experiencers of love as we are willing to be in love’s deepest want.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. You can make a one time donation to SoulFullHeart at https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
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